Honoring God in Your Marriage
September 2023 Partner Letter
Dear Partner,
1 Samuel 2:30 NLT says….
30 “…..But I will honor those who honor me, and I will despise those who think lightly of me.”
Did you know that God not only wants to honor you in your personal life, but that He also desires to honor your marriage? God created marriage between one male and one female (Genesis 2:18-24). And God wants to honor and BLESS what He created. God is love, and His grace is sufficient, but yes, even now in the 21st century of course, He still wants us knowledgeable of His laws, righteousness, do’s and don’ts. God needs us knowing what is right and wrong in His eyes.
And you know what? God doesn’t set the measure of His love for us based on our performance (Nothing can separate us from God’s love—Romans 8:38-39), and it does also say in the WORD in Romans 5:8…… “While we were yet sinners, Christ DIED for us.” See, there’s the proof in the scriptures concerning God’s love for us that it is not based on our performance. Yet at the same time there are a lot of things that God can not actually do for us if we are not doing our part, which is what He expects of us. It’s His love for us that causes Him to yearn for us to know His will and expectations on us so He can lavish us with His honor in more ways than some!
Our lack of knowledge can give place to us not receiving honor in various areas, due to us simply not knowing better. You can’t do what you don’t know. You can’t have faith for what you don’t know is yours. You may say “But I’ve been doing everything I know to do” and yet it seems that your marriage, job, health or family doesn’t seem to be getting any better. It may even look like nothing is ever going to change. But it doesn’t stop there if you believe and act on God’s WORD.
What do you do when all you know is not enough? Sometimes…..you gotta know more! There’s a reason why there’s grade levels in school. There’s more wisdom, knowledge and understanding at that next level. There’s always something to learn. The answer to your specific situation may not be the same every time. One time the answer could be “Just rest in God’s faithfulness and wait patiently for Him to act.” And another time the answer could be that you haven’t got a WORD or a revelation from Him yet due to not seeking Him like you should be, or not asking Him for it. Or, you haven’t spent time in the WORD for the Holy Ghost to show you something you could do that’ll be key in seeing change. Therefore His wisdom remains hidden FOR you and not revealed to you yet. (He can reveal this wisdom through His WORD, teaching, a mentor, etc).
Just like in our personal lives, it’s the same in marriage. God is waiting for us to act and apply His WORD and honor Him in our marriage so He can pour out His honor in and on our marriage. “But where do I start?” you may ask. We start with searching for specific topics in His WORD so we’ll know exactly what He said about it so we can then do it. Find out what the WORD says about going to church, tithing, walking in the fruit of the spirit and having equipped the armor of God, unity, and more. But there’s a certain topic I want to put attention to that the Lord put on my heart to share, because it’s been entering in like a thief to rob people of their marriage.
Today there are married christians who are dishonoring God in their marriage even when they don’t realize it. In Matthew 5:28 NLT Jesus said……
28 “But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.”
In that scripture the word “lust” in Greek is epithymeō, which means “to have a desire for” or “long for.”
Anyone who looks at someone with lust, is actually sinning. That “desire” turns into “daydreaming” and fantasizing. Which causes one to “long for” someone else, even if it is for a moment, yet it is still wrong, sin, and missing the mark in God’s eyes. When a married person (or anyone) lusts after a person, those desires are for relationship and sexual desires. Which is stepping over boundaries and now embracing attraction for someone other than the one God gave you. Any type of lust for another person is sin. Tolerated lust is continual dishonor towards God. When God gave you a spouse He gave you someone you can desire for, long for and HAVE, for life.
The world has embraced and tolerated lust for so long that it has snuck it’s way into churches and christian marriages without any conviction. Example, many people, while at work, use the term “work husband” or “work wife.” Let me explain this, a woman goes to work and becomes friends with a guy, even a little flirting may happen here and there, and then she starts calling him her “work husband.” This has been a topic for decades around the world and all over social media.
Here’s another example of how people are dishonoring God in their marriage. Some think that if a person is famous, say they are a movie star, actor, actress, singer, professional athlete etc, then it’s okay to lust after them and continually call that person their “crush.” Even while watching a movie with their spouse, they sit there in sin, lusting after, desiring and longing for the person on tv. That’s dishonoring, and disrespect towards God and your spouse. Some marriages are being destroyed by lack of knowledge. Whether you’ll ever meet that famous person or not, lust is lust, and righteousness is righteousness. Will you honor God in the marriage HE prepared for you? Or will you dishonor God by lusting and coveting after someone else? Choose life, choose to honor God in your marriage and watch Him BLESS it and USE your marriage to witness effectively to others!
This is a topic that is not being discussed or taught on in the body of Christ as much as it should be. When we study these scriptures we will learn how to honor God in our marriage with our eyes, feelings, emotions and attraction.
James 1:14-15 NLT says……
14 Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away.
15 These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.
Giving in to temptation will drag us away from the will of God and into a situation that we’d regret. I once heard a phrase many years ago from Joyce Meyer that will stick with me for the rest of my life, she said “Wisdom is making a choice right now that you won’t ever have to regret later.”
You see, sin has enough power to stop a good thing when there is no change in one’s heart. And Jesus is the one who came to set us TOTALLY FREE from all sin and bondage! Read John 8:36.
It is God’s will for us to live a life that is holy and free from the chains of sin that would hinder us from living and experiencing the sweet life God has planned for those who fear Him, trust Him and look to Him as their source.
1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 NLT says………
3 God’s will is for you to be holy, so stay away from all sexual sin.
4 Then each of you will control his own body and live in holiness and honor—
5 not in lustful passion like the pagans who do not know God and his ways.”
You see, living in willful sin is like, living a lifestyle that pleases your own fleshly desires and you don’t know who God is or anything about Him and could care less. Which is absolute dangerous ground to walk on. Because our own actions, are seeds. If we plant bad seeds, we’ll get bad results. If we plant good seeds and stay in faith, we’ll get good results. It’s that simple. God has laid out a good plan for us all. But it’s our job to stay in the WORD and learn of it.
If you want to be strong in spirit, and NOT weak in the flesh, then do not make provision for the flesh!
Romans 13:13-14 NLT says……..
13 Because we belong to the day, we must live decent lives for all to see. Don’t participate in the darkness of wild parties and drunkenness, or in sexual promiscuity and immoral living, or in quarreling and jealousy.
14 Instead, clothe yourself with the presence of the Lord Jesus Christ. And don’t let yourself think about ways to indulge your evil desires.
This is something huge I love about God, He not only tells us what not to do, but He then always tells us exactly what we SHOULD do.
He’s saying “Don’t attend wild parties, don’t get drunk, don’t get in sexual sin, don’t allow arguing and jealousy to enter/stay in you, but instead, remind yourself of God’s presence that’s on you and don’t let yourself think on sinful thoughts.”
How simple and amazing is that?! It’s so clear. So simple, yet how many are actually doing it? As the body of Christ we can do better. Let’s get intentional about honoring God in our marriage. Your marriage isn’t blessed and honorable because you go to church. Your marriage is blessed and honorable because you’re learning about what God says do and not do, and you’re obedient to Him and His ways. When you grow in your relationship with the Lord you’ll care more and more about what matters to him. You care more about your spouse because you’ve grown together. But live God’s way and watch Him bless and honor your marriage!
You’re not “in sin” when you notice an attractive person, you’re in sin when you insist to continually look at that person because of attraction which turns into lust and wrong fleshly desires. I could add a lot more scriptures but we’ll end this for now with two more verses.
2 Timothy 2:22 NLT says……
22 Run from anything that stimulates youthful lusts. Instead, pursue righteous living, faithfulness, love, and peace. Enjoy the companionship of those who call on the Lord with pure hearts.
Galatians 5:16 NLT says…
16 So I say, let the Holy Spirit guide your lives. Then you won’t be doing what your sinful nature craves.
Whether you’re praying and believing God for a spouse, or you’re already married, make the decision right now to honor God unlike you ever have before! The sweet life God has for you ins in HIS plan!
I want to end this partner letter by encouraging you to send us your prayer request!
Text our ministry at 865-236-1414 and I’ll respond myself and pray with you. (Yes, our ministry’s number can receive text messages).
I pray for you everyday!
Remember, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE IF A PERSON BELIEVES!
Terry Minor Jr
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